Why Women Should Celebrate the Successes of Other Women
Competition. Comparison. Social Media. Believe it or not, these are significant parts of our lives as women. We waste countless hours ruminating on these things amidst our computer scrolling. Sad, that after hundreds of decades of years of strife, and finally inclusion and respect, us—women—have allowed these traits and pastimes to dictate how we feel about someone else, more specifically other women.
You see, I'm more or less a "Golden Girl" meets librarian meets Liz Lemon meets moderate Christian... living in a Kardashian world. A world that in fact promotes, flaunts and idolizes appearance and perception, and to not be superior to these things is to equate to failure. This sounds harsh, right? Well, trust me, no one is harder on themselves than women, and no one can be more critical of themselves either.
In all of our authentic and dynamic traits, we women have the capacity to appreciate so much about life, to affect and applaud so much positivitity of what we see in others, more particularly the successes of other women. When we scroll through our Insragram feed it is almost as if once we catch a glimpse of another woman's recently conquered hurdle we quickly, albet quietly at times, assess our own current feats. We unfairly imagine that our own accolades should match those around us. This defeating perspective is toxic and it quickly spreads through our thoughts and actions as we allow our mind to take us to a place of covetness and disdain for the achievements of other women.
Ah, but my wonderful, astute, and courageous ladies, take heart. When you find the beauty in supporting and learning from one another, it's something that can be powerful and growth producing in your own life.
Camaraderie is essential.
Let me just get this out of the way, we are human, and therefore were designed for community. As women, our lives seem to ebb and flow in accordance to our social interaction, interests and personal goals. To form true camaraderie with our fellow females is to come together, not just under the assumption of similarities, but through assimilation and pride. To build up and encourage one another is individually affirming, and to affirm one another transcends just simply having things in common with someone or having similar perspectives. There is power in numbers and strength in the unfailing support of your sisters.
Admiration looks good on people.
I've got to tell you, the level of negativity surrounding every ounce of media we frequent these days is enough to make you want to hole up somewhere, eat your feelings, and keep the happiest of Disney films on repeat all day long. I'm guilty of allowing negativity to impact not only my thoughts about others, but my actions as well. It's one of my many vices of being a natural cynic. Dissent seeps into my words very easily and I have to be very intentional about how I allow it to affect me. We must choose to share in the joys, successes, hardships (offering encouragement as opposed to snickers) and go get 'ems. Let's face it, jealousy and mockery are toxic and typically when we do it, it's a poor attempt to overcompensate for some aspect of our lives that we feel is deficient. Have the courage to say to someone what you yourself hope to hear or see from someone else.
Celebrating others builds compassion and inspiration.
We live in a world with what seems one heart-wrenching incident or accident happens to erupt after another. With ongoing difficult news reels to burn, and so much familiarity with posting every aspect of our lives across social media depicting both elations and trials, it is not hard to conclude that the times are tough and kindness is paramount. Now, more than ever, we have opportunities to be criticized by others and also to show others more compassion. The truth is, what we read, see, and expose ourselves to impacts how we react to the world. Allowing ourselves to build up a friend following, losing a hopeful opportunity can open a door for encouragement and learning experiences. An opportunity for people to change their potentially negative perspective to that of a learning curve or a better opportunity can inspire hope and endurance. Creatively, what we feed into the world, what we speak into the lives of others, helps shape what we allow to influence us and inspire us.
Life can feel competitive, intense, and self motivating. Are we incapable of honoring the successes of the women around us, abroad, and online? What true value is there in allowing jealousy or judgment to persuade us from supporting the women that history and our own gut intuition have implored us to stand up for and cheer?
Let's allow our innate compassion and reserve to pave the way for continued praise and accomplishments for each and every woman around us. Let's reflect the kind of words and actions that we hope to be on the receiving end of someday.